Title: In Die Nacht
Author: gue laaahh
Fandom: Tokio Hotel
Pairing: TomxBill
Rating: PG-13
Warnings Kissing. Dude!
Summary: First sin, when their bodies realize that this isn't brotherly love anymore
Author Notes: Again, Blame acu_saree, I'm not responsible for any of these. Ugh, it was written on my cellphone on the way to work yesterday... so grammatical errors everywhere, people!

(  I don't want to be alone there Let us go together In the night At some point it'll be time Let us go together In the night )

Honestly, I'm supposed to be on hiatus! Jesus Christ! Saree!!!
So, honestly, I'm sooooo lazy to post this. Again, Saree!!!!

Just. Whatever. If not because I love you so much and I feel the urge to cheer you up at this moment, I wouldn't bother to bother myself like this.

Title: Last Night I Saw My World Explode
Author: who else?
Fandom: Super Junior (OH My God I'm not Even really a fan of this fandom. Saree!!!!)
Pairing: ShiwonxHeechul
Rating: PG
Warnings Uhhh... Angst. Don't read if you want a happy-lappy-lovey-forever kind of fic
Summary: Shiwon and HeeChul are living together, who knows who betrays who?
Autor Notes: AH. I can just say acu_saree owe me 5893 mcr fictions for this. Just. Don't expect more than what i can bear.
PS. Un-beta-ed. Not True. Purely fiction. all mistakes are mine.

( blablabla )

Uh... Hey.
Gosh, i feel like an alien in my own journal.
it's been...what? 3 months? two? four? Whatever ladies. nobody cares anyway. Neither am I.

So...*takes a long breath* like i told the world, I got a job. And I'm gonna lose it. It's weird, huh? when you were at school all the thing you could think about was 'make money,make money, just make the fucking money'. And when you're on the way on making the money you were talking about, suddenly all doesnt seem to make sense anymore.
When time feels so tight and fastened, throat burning, eyes watering, ears blaring music out from headphones pressed close-tight to prevent any sound leaks in. You just want to stop doing this. just want to stop facing the screen. just want to grab fingers from typing the same words, the same numbers, again and again and suddenly time ticking close to 7 o'clock and you grab your empty bottle and walk out without forgetting the slot-machine blockng your way and home and sleep (no bath) and hello, morning again. an hour before go to work.
again. repeating. routinity.

Want to stop.
But a lot of what ifs following under te resignation letter you grab tight inside your sweaty palm.
Just. Oh fuck.

I'll be away. For i dont know how long. for-ever. tired. no. no anymore that stuff. Thanks for all the nice moments we shared.

Sefany
20-5-1990 - Forever



Because memories never die.

Dear acu_saree, I've been promising you a lot of things, yet there's never a certain moment to fulfil all.

You may be granted my best gratitude, you know. For you were there when I need to throw everything up.
For you were there listening patiently to me rambling about The Moving Out The City Guy.
And for you were there as a replacement of that smelly restroom =P

So, today I woke up at 10 (despite the horrible sleep and stupid nightmare), and suddenly felt like wanting to do something I haven't done in a while. So I told you I might be late =P That was an old one, I just made a change here and there, and really, my stupid mood told me to make the smiles dissapear.


( Don't blame anything on me after you see this )

meme stolen from vmnonekowhile typing something *cough*naughty*cough* with bl4ckm4lice

i am FINE.

F.I.N.E

Frustated. Insecure. Neurotic. Emotional.

( no more of your fucking ride cause I'll make myself buy and ride that goddamned motorbike )

For those who are concerned, have I told you how much I appreciate each of your support dears? Thank you for being there via-sms and YM when I was at my worst.

got tagged by acu_saree

Game rules:
A． People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves. Tag 8 people. Those who are tagged cannot refuse.
B． These 8 people must state who they were tagged by. You cannot tag the person who tagged you. Continue this game by sending this to 8 other people. People who are tagged will be blessed and their wishes will come true in the future.

( a hard question, can I get two rather than one? )

These are the ones that I appreciate a lot that haven't got listed in Saree's tag. enjoy!
justangel
totchiaishiteru
erikaoi
seiichiyamagai
naochii
reguretto
vmnoneko
fxxker_fams304

happy b'day kyo!!![

you know, you're always the one, the only one that I wanted to meet. that so many years passed but I'm still one of your fans, excluding the fact that I get bored with things easily. and you're one of the few things that i never get bored of =P

wishing you a peaceful birthday, a successful life, and keep going with the voice that melts everything.

i think i just lost appetite in doing everything....?

maybe i should delete this journal.

gue kalah segala2nya dari dia.
asli deh, baru kali ini gw bener2 desperate gini.
ya bukannya penting banget sih... tapi tetep aja. she just looks perfect.
beautiful, perfect-shaped body, smart, rich, well-known, nice, friendly. just nice, the statement Isna always says.

anyway, I've been alright. everything is alright. it's not even hurting, I wonder why =P

UAN sebentar lagi... ganbatte kudasai minna!

At work, 3 days of partime job, Mo wasn't being 'Mo' at all. At work, 8 hours each day, Mo turned into Ms. F.

( and here goes the story.... )



anyway, i finally submitted to University of Batam today, since i already recieved the letter that told me that i got the scholarship for Computer Engineering program. It's not the best university, but i can do nothing since i have no money to get to better univ ^^;It's also only for Diploma program, though

I'll be a university student soon!! =D please do pray for me to pass the national examination!

Tuhan itu memang baik yaaaa... disaat gw putus asa karena ga jadi submit ke NUS, dateng tawaran beasiswa yg biarpun dari universitas kelas 3, tapi lumayanlah untuk org yg ga punya duit buat masuk bahkan buat ke univ kaya gitu sekalipun.

stolen from seiichiyamagai

ok guys, HAPPY NEW YEAR....

though I spent a boring night alone at home while the others went out with their friends. well, no one would remember a living thing called Mo at that kind of situation, eh? But that's ok, i found a peaceful night and the worst nightmare at the end of the year after watched my favorite Indonesian movie, Nagabonar jadi 2 =P

anyway, i realized that i've been acting annoying and strange lately, sorry if i was being a burden for you all back then -_-; I'm trying to get rid of these things... 

and about new year resolution, well, i think i have to make it (though 50% of my resolutions last year went to trash, dunno how to manage it to 100% this year...)

1. try to get a good score for my national examination (at least, i hope, 8.20)
2. start the preparation of getting another scholarship next year and find a good job and save money for a year before go to univ
3. stop accusing people around me. they didn't do anything wrong, i know I did. I do. 
4. learn to become a better one, to control my emotion, and my mouth as well.
5. make some other friends and stop being harsh to people i dont like.... (okay, the HARDEST one)
6. be my self. 

and i tell you i'm not going to do the things i dont want to do anymore, i'm not going to pretend like i'm a good kid anymore, i'll be just my self. no one can rule me (my mother is exceptional...).

i am facing a new year yet i feel so down....
everyone wants me to change, to be someone that is not me at all.
am I that wrong?
am i that weird?
i even scared to make friends... 

you know what their parents say about me? you know why they never call me again now? 
am i that fucking wrong?!

confused.

oh my god i just want to become a rich man in instant now. the scholarship thingy is confusing me and i dont even know what should i do....

have someone got any scholarship before? i need to be told what to do, what to write, what to say....

 hahahahahaha.....

who the hell you think you are? bitch.

I'm getting bored with LJ. dont know why...
bu ce tau, ye bu siang yao ce tau...
(don't know, and don't want to know)

my fav words recently. haha, i know, it shows how careless i am, eh? but surely, i get bored on everything recently... a week with tight,depressing schedule just makes me want to throw everything away, to pour everything that has been hanging in my head. don't mention that i'm a very irritable person.

anyway, i begin to think that i'm being left behind by everyone. Not that i want them to always by my side. haha, it's a very complicated feeling you know. i haven't met my friends yet, i know they're busy... and it makes the feeling sinks deeper. and something occured and i think i'm going to lost another friend. not that i mind.... ok, damn, i DO mind about it.

i am not a perfect person, you know... if you want me to always be perfect, you'd better go away eventhough i'd feel really sad and regret it after that.

aiyah... okay everyone just go away and don't come back.

( Tuhan, aku takut mati... )

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Personality Disorder:	High
Schizoid Personality Disorder:	Very High
Schizotypal Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Antisocial Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Borderline Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Histrionic Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Narcissistic Personality Disorder:	High
Avoidant Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Dependent Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	Moderate
-- Take the Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Info --

what the fuck? i don't think i'm narcistic at all.... >_>;;;